Ray Stevens On The President

Hilarious.

H/T Patriot Action Network

Cross Posted at Classical Values

Michelle - Obama is Finished

I seem to have gotten the Michelle Obama quote wrong.

It's important for him to finish what he started.

If she has started whining about her husband finishing the work he started two years before the next election I'd say he was already finished.

Cross Posted at Classical Values

Calling Mr. Merlin

From Camelot to Camel Lot in two years or less. Running the Merlin Engine in reverse.

Inspired by No Camelot 2.0

Chin Up

Cross Posted at Classical Values

Satisfaction Not Guaranteed

And yes Virginia, and California, and New York, there is a BS Removal Kit you can order.

H/T Instapundit

Icons

Bill Whittle has a new Afterburner. And in response to it, I'd like to do my bit for those who need a typographical icon (watch the vid to get the joke).

L∅L!

And for those who need technical details: the html for ∅ is ∅

Cross Posted at Classical Values

Overheard On The 'Net

The obama administration:

Hype and Chains

obama Action Figure

More like an obama INaction figure. It has no moving parts.

From the comments at Hot Air

Getting Into Position

Getting Into Position

Inspired by Lois Koenig on Facebook who did not ask for a caption. I offered one anyway.

Who Pays Him?

Obama is in the pay of Big Government. And you can take that to the bank. If he hasn't nationalized your.

I Found A Joke

I found a really good Obama Joke in the comments at ECN magazine:

A woman in a hot-air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Republican."

"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."

The man smiled and responded, "You must be an Obama Democrat."

"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"

"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's my fault."

Here is a book of Obama Jokes:

Politically Incorrect Barack Obama Jokes

It did not get a very good rating. I'm not totally sure if it was because of Obama or because of the jokes.

Cross Posted at Classical Values

Shake YOUR Hand?

Obama in Russia. Evidently the guy don't get no respect.

H/T Backyard Conservative

Stimunism

H/T Commenter Wes from Four Times As Much

Cross Posted at Classical Values

The Perfect One

Obama is NOT Jesus. Jesus knew how to put a cabinet together.

I guess that’s the difference between the two Messiahs. Obama spends and Jesus saves.

Followers of The One will find The Story of O very helpful for the New Age. You will be abused and you will love it.

Somewhere in Chicago, a community is missing its organizer.

Some of the above was stolen from these comments. Some I just made up myself.

H/T Eric at Classical Values.

Cross Posted at Classical Values

Something To Look Forward To

Why do I feel like I have been strapped into a roller coaster against my will, with the management ripping up the tracks to sell as scrap and the lift has just reached the top of the drop off point?

Sgt. Mom Found A Good One

Sgt. Mom, blogging under the pseudonym Celia Hayes, left this comment at Althouse about the Obama Administration.

"I knew it was gonna be a train wreck, but I thought it would have pulled out of the station, first!"

Sgt. Mom writes books. You should read some.

H/T Instapundit

Cross Posted at Classical Values

Obama Jokes

So I'm Googling around type "Obama" into Google and the #2 item on the list with over 8 million references is "Obama jokes". Well I got to get me some of those. My favorite so far is "Barack Obama is President of the United States". I'm sure he will get funnier as time goes on. There is a site called The Barack Obama Jokes Website which is supposed to have some real jokes. You know like the joke is on him.

Harry Truman said, “The buck stops here!”
Barack Obama says, “Leave the bucks here!”

Not bad.

Q. Why did Obama change his name from Barry to Barack?
A. He thought Barry sounded too American.

That is going to leave a mark.

Now here is a pair that seems to go together.

Q. Why will Jane Fonda vote for Barack Obama?
A. Because Ho Chi Minh is dead.

Q. Why will Ho Chi Minh vote for Barack Obama?
A. Because Ho Chi Minh is dead.

Chicago politicians. They are special. Luckily we have one for President.

Have you ever noticed how Obama thinks nothing is impossible as long as somebody else has to pay for it?

I thought that was the motto of Democrats everywhere.

Blessed are they who find Obama funny, for they shall never cease to be entertained.

I'm counting on it. Only Three Years 11 months 1 weeks and 5 days to go. Why is that so painful? I think this one explains it.

Even though Obama doesn't have any experience, we'll get plenty.

Here is a rather nasty one from the election.

“But all this doesn’t matter because Obama keeps pulling away in the polls. Every week, he gets a little more ahead. And with almost all groups. Liberals, of course, always supported him. … And conservatives like the idea of paying a black man to clean up their mess.” ~Bill Maher

Of course that was before the election. Things are looking different now. I think he will be running his 2012 campaign on this platform: "New and Better Messes". And it only took him a little over two weeks to get a good start.

Here is one for you:

Q. Why was George Bush happy that Obama got elected?

A. He thought it would improve his standing with history. What surprised Bush is that it only took two weeks.

OK. I'm going to finish this post with a turtle.

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year-old Texas rancher whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Obama and his bid to be our President. The old rancher said, "Well, ya know, Obama is a "post turtle." Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a "post turtle" was. The old rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a "post turtle". The old rancher saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain. "You know he didn't get up there by himself, he doesn't belong up there, he doesn't know what to do while he is up there, and you just wonder what kind of a dumb ass put him up there."

Which reminds me: "The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average Obama voter."

And if you want more and are tired of surfing the 'net you can always read the book: Barack Obama Jokes.

Cross Posted at Classical Values