Friday, November 11, 2005

It Is All About Enforcement

Over at Jane Galt's there is a discussion of abortion going on. [hat tip Instapundit.] I have left a few comments which I repeat here:

If abortion becomes against the law the law will need to be enforced.

If our drug laws are any indication we will need a Pregnancy Enforcement Administration. The PEA. The PEA brains will need to have enforcers and snitches and the whole repressive apparatus for control.

And instead of 20,000 or so murder investigations a year we will have to have 200,000 murder investigations. And prisons. And guards. etc.

All this for a practice that is at least 2,500 years old.

Now perhaps, despite 2,500 years of moral opprobrium, it is possible that a practice of such long standing has some value to humans. Like drugs for instance.

And of course every miscarriage will need a murder investigation.

And women will need to be watched for tell tale signs of pregnancy.

And how about those anonymous tip lines. Great for those who have a grudge. Accusations will need to be followed up. The woman in question will need to go to a government certified lab for inspectiion.

Well if that is the way it is going to be - I want to be Chief Inspector. For the right consideration, I'm sure the charges can be dropped as unfounded or at least inconclusive.

And don't forget the problem of fetal alcohol syndrome. Perhaps alcohol prohibition for women ages 10 to 60 is in order. FAS is a serious problem and requires a serious solution.

It is obvious that we do not have enough secret police (undercover operatives) in America.

I am going to love the "tender breast" road side check - preliminay signs of a possible pregnancy.

Or perhaps we can have trained dogs who will sniff (up close and personal) and alert if there is the right smell. My dog is going to alert not only for the correct smells but also when I give the secret hand sign.

In the PEA our best operatives will be certified as VIPs. Vagina Inspection Police.

The possibilities are endless.

If we are really serious women will need to be government pregnancy checked every week. Maybe daily.

Suppose we do it weekly. Suppose doing the test costs $25. And say there are about 100 million women who between 10 and 60.

For a cost of only about $130 billion a year we can eliminate abortion. Given the usual mark up and administration requirements say $250 billion. For only a quarter trillion a year we can eliminate at least 99% of all abortions.

Every woman in America will need to become enrolled in the PEA database. Periods will need to be charted. Sex partners tracked. Those PEA brains think of everything.

Of course the women will need to be watched giving samples and video taped to make sure the watchers aren't getting frisky. Or helping too much.

I think a big market might open up for "hair stylists". To make sure the videos look good. And the feminine hygyne product lobby will certainly be a supporter once they understand the possibilities.

And if some of the tapes make the 'net? No problem. There is no right to privacy. Especially from the government.


Unknown Pundit said...

First off, let me say that those posts from Megan were all very good.

And M. Simon, love the PEA and PEA brains. Spot on funny.

I used to believe that all the moral preening we see in politics came mostly from the Left. However, I've come to realize that the Right has more than their fair share of moral preening going on, courtesy of the Right's self-described "social conservatives".
For these folks, it's not enough to be morally correct, the law must reflect their ideas of morality and no one else's.

From my vantage point, all I see are the self-righteous saying "Look at me Lord! I'm taking a stand against sin! I want to punish the abortionist. I want to see to it that the sexual sinner is punished. I want to see to it that the drug sinner is punished." Heaven forbid that anyone of these religious folks have to actually convert anyone of these sinners and have them show up in the church pew. Seems to me that Jesus would want his flock out trying to convert people to the faith, not see that they are thrown in jail.

As I commented earlier on another post, it seems most Christians nowadays don't care whether you believe in God or not, but they do support laws that force to you to live your life as if you did. Not very Christian, if you ask me.

The Parson said...

This post is hilarious. PEA brains--I love it. So are you hoping this all happens so you can get on as an inspector? As for Randman, these are some good points. I am passionately anti-abortion; my view, however, is that we should change minds before we change laws. If abortion really is evil, a rational discussion should reveal that. And if it really is to be rooted out, then maybe the church would be more effective helping the young women who are pregnant instead of demonizing them. Just a thought.

Mahndisa S. Rigmaiden said...

11 17 05

Good points:
You speak of the legal consequences of making a moral decision in the courts. Check out Allison's Epiphany in Progess's blog (highlighted on my current post) to see another consequence. Ironically I am morally COMPLETELY pro life. HOwever my ethics and legal curiosity make me think that outlawing abortion completely might not be in the best fiscal interests of our country, not to mention the implied privacy constructs that would be violated across the board! Tough questions...Good post:)

M. Simon said...

Allison's Epiphany in Progress.

Or Mahndisa's post with the link..

richard mcenroe said...

We've already got those dogs. Ever see one that wouldn't put its nose where it wasn't wanted?