A Dirty Story: Dirt Bag Gets Kid in Trouble

Now you are probably wondering what kind of miscreant is harming some poor innocent kid. This was no miscreant. This was an actual bag of dirt. Really, a kid got in trouble at school for putting some dirt in a bag and giving the dirt to another kid.

Why? There in lies a tale.

It starts out with a kid on a playground. The kid finds a baggie on the playground. An empty baggie. The kid fills the baggie with dirt, rocks, and some clover. The kid (female) takes a ribbon from her hair and puts it around the bag to make a present. And gives it to another kid.

Now the kid recieving the present shows it to a teacher. Naturally the teacher goes ballistic. Obviously the bag is full of fake drugs. And we have laws against fake drugs. The girl who made up the bag got a two day suspension. And what did this six year old dope fiend have to say about giving away fake drugs to another six year old?

"They said it was kind of a drug," Michaela said. "I don't know what those are. I only see cigarettes. That's all I say."

Zero tolerance has turned into infinite stupidity. Well what did you expect? Here is what you expect from law enforcement. Sikeston Police Sgt. Shirley Porter has an opinion:

In Porter's eyes, 6-year-old Michaela Boyd was dealing fake drugs, and that's a crime. "If she would have been 14, we would have been arrested her and taken her to jail," Porter said.

So there you are folks. You can now be put in jail if you are over 14 for a bag of dirt. Because some people put drugs in those bags. Of course some people put sandwiches in such bags.

Is this beginning to make sense? No? Welcome to the drug war. Where dirt is drugs and weeds are worth their weight in gold.

You can get more of the ugly details of this dirty story here.